How relaxation can actually make you more creative and energetic.

I’d always been the type who’d choose to continuously keep working. I took up two jobs when I was just in college, while everyone was having the time of their life: partying and hanging out with friends; I chose to sit back and find ways to either gain more knowledge, or study harder, or earn some money. I was constantly working. I remember my first year was wreck because of this.

I thought all those things, which a lot of my friends and colleagues did were a waste of my time. For this driven nature of mine, I came across as someone who was “snooty” or “snobby” to go out, or even rude, or someone who didn’t wanna make friends. [Well don’t take me wrong, I don’t think what others did was wrong, instead I feel I needed to do things differently. AND, I did make my set of groupies, who really understood why I did what I did. AND till date, I am super thick with them and a call away.]

Woman relaxing lying on a couch at home

But, for a very very very long time, I was the type who would choose to not have “fun”, or go out or really know what it meant to enjoy myself. I didn’t know what relaxation meant. I had a clear vision in my mind and I knew I had to achieve a my goals, faster. This attitude did help me initially, but it drained me completely, after a couple of years. I lost my mojo to work. Because of which, I started questioning myself. I started questioning my ambitions too. In that moment, I realized that I truly needed to sit back, take some time off and truly evaluate what I needed to do.

To truly explain where I’m going with this, I’ll tell you a story. I recently learned how to swim. And I am soooo thankful for my teacher because, I’ve picked up all the strokes quite well, in just one month’s time. I practice them daily. One day, while I was swimming, something hit me. I’d swim better if I am relaxed in water. I knowwww, it isn’t some rocket science or a big revelation, however, it did teach me a big lesson. When we’re in a relaxed state, (which comes from conscious decision making in the moment), we can achieve our targets better and more easily. Our life is fluid like the water, therefore, if we panic more, we don’t allow the environment around us to keep us afloat, instead we allow it to pull us down and drown us. When we are calm in the fluid state, we’re automatically buoyant, so we’re afloat.

After reflecting upon this simple Continue reading “How relaxation can actually make you more creative and energetic.”

Let’s handle criticisms like a pro.

If you’ve ever struggled with criticisms and have found that you feel disheartened, dejected, lost, troubled, agitated, angry, bugged, jealous, even anxious, or have started doubting yourself… then my friend, this post is for you.

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Before we head on the juicy stuff, I’ll specify what do I mean by the term “pro.” I’ll borrow the explanation, which Steven Pressfield uses in his books, War of Art and Turning Pro. He uses the word pro as an indicative of ‘a professional.’ When we are a professional, we are ready to leave the amateurish behavior behind us, i.e. we’re ready to deal with every situation in a way as though it pays us forward. And there is no scope for mediocrity, in our pursuit. We are ready to acknowledge the fact that we’re the best at what we pursue, in any sphere of life, which is why we’d hire ourselves to do the job we wanna do. And give it all that we can.

When we are pros, we understand that criticisms are simply comments that we may, or may not, consider. It depends upon the source or even the context. We know that external criticisms are primarily a reflection of that person’s thoughts or inner being. Instead of dwelling on someone’s disapproval, or condemnation, or evaluation, or eve jealousy, we need to truly evaluate how are we dealing with the situation? We know it that the only thing we can change or modify is our thoughts, reaction and action, in any given situation.

Imagine yourself at work Continue reading “Let’s handle criticisms like a pro.”

Turn your negative emotions into positive results.

An ex-colleague came to me for some advice. She felt that she was always irritated with people around her, she was getting jealous of those in her immediate circle within the organization, who’d climbed the ladder and she felt she hadn’t. She said, she didn’t feel good about herself and constantly felt jealous and angry. She told me, “Priyanka I am stuck in my own negativity. I should’ve been further ahead by now.” She’d get so stuck with her own negative emotion that it even affected her work and added to her stress.

Business woman working at desk

I heard her out completely. Then, instead of simply giving her advice I shared a story. Recently, a family member really really close to me commented on my business and lifestyle. He said that I’m constantly in the kitchen and had no other work in life. I was wasting my intellect and time. At that time, I almost got offended [because not only do I run my own independent consultancy, I also do coaching, I’m doing my doctorate, and also taking care of my family & health (for which I, of course, need to be in my healthy kitchen and in the gym. My rituals are pretty much non-negotiable)]. After being angry for the whole day, I realized my negative emotion isn’t taking me anywhere. I also realized it is a reflection of my own insecurities and not his. It was only affecting me. After being in that angry state for a few hours, I turned my anger into a consumable fuel for Continue reading “Turn your negative emotions into positive results.”

Do we [really] need a social media detox?

I’ve been receiving a lot of emails these days with comments and some good questions from people who follow my blog. There was a common pattern that I observed. Apparently, EVERYONE IS SICK OF SOCIAL MEDIA!

Social Media Detox

That is true! And my initial reaction to this was, “Don’t blame it on the social media tools.” People are unable to control their own negative emotions and blaming it on social media. I also questioned myself, “how can people get sick of social media? It is not social media’s fault?” However, I cringed at the thought of this, shook my head and consciously changed my thoughts. I pulled myself back from my “tough” ENTJ personality to really understand the underlying feelings. I immediately reflected upon this, through an empathetic lens, “why would so many people feel irritated with someone else’s posts, pictures, and more?” The most common emotions that emerged from the “social-media-led comparison syndrome” were jealousy, the feeling of not being “good enough,” low self-confidence, less self-worth and in some cases clinical depression (above linked HBR study, states a few more).

I felt like I had to take sides in this argument, whether Continue reading “Do we [really] need a social media detox?”