One of my friends in the gym (let’s call her Reena) asked me a serious question. When she got to know I was a performance coach, she came running, feeling angst and conflicted and saddened by a situation. She asked me to make her more “approachable as a personality.”
I was surprised by this and said, why does she think she isn’t approachable? I found her to be pretty straighforward. She said, not that she truly cared about what people thought about her… but it did matter to her that the others shouldn’t feel intimidated. Reena felt that a lot of people found her either daunting or even irritating. She looked quite approachable to me and personally, I felt we were quite alike (and I know I’m pretty approachable, so to say).
I’ve known her for a while and I see Reena as a strong and motivated individual. She is intelligent, courageous and driven to get results. She has been brutally honest, always consciously looked at the bright side of things, she had firm respect for herself, personal ethics and courtesies, just as I did. She gave the benefit of doubt wherever necessary and chose to not get involved in the “drama” or conflict too much, unless, she could turn it into something positively creative (more on that later). She loved to stick around with people who emitted a positive vibe and sort of detached herself from those who didn’t. She was quite introspective and loved to grow. She was always direct and to the point (personally, the kind of people I like as part of my tribe). When she approached me with her concern thinking that something was perhaps wrong with her… because people might be getting intimidated… I looked her in the eye and I said, really, is that what you think…? Does it really matter what the